Intro to Improvisation
by ThrowAway92
Summary: Following Season 3 finale. Following Pierce v. Shirley, Jeff reflects on the changes he's gone through and resolves to find his father. Meanwhile, Annie decides to keep her promise to Abed by swearing to begin 'winging it' more often.
1. Prologue

**A/N- Hello everyone! This is my first ever attempt at creative writing, so I apologize if my style is a little bit…raw. Anyway, I'm not sure where this story will go or how far I'll take it, but for now I just wanted to get it out there to help alleviate the pain of waiting for the new season. Enjoy/criticize to your heart's content! -TA**

Jeff Winger has turned the corner.

At least, that's what he told himself, as he held his index finger over the 'Enter' key on his laptop. After the past two months, being expelled, staging an elaborate heist to rescue the real Dean, and effectively setting back his career a good year or two, he felt drained. He felt exhausted. He felt a little….different. Not a bad kind of different, just….different. He felt like he had grown, or at least that he had begun to reap the benefits of three years worth of growing. He thought hard to pinpoint exactly what catalyzed the shift in his attitude that had finally manifested itself during that stupid court case from the day before. However, the more he thought, the less sure that there was a specific event. His thoughts began to wander instead to the group of six people that had been present with him constantly for the past three years.

He thought about Abed, how his weird, inaccessible and sometimes totally creepy detachment from social reality allowed him to be practically bursting with self-confidence. Sure, he expressed it in a different way than most people would, but that was Abed. The important thing was that he showed Jeff that friends can show up where you least expected them to, a lesson Jeff had always kept in the back of his mind, he guessed, but never really appreciated it until recently.

He thought about Troy, Abed's perennial partner-in-crime, a kid so loyal and sometimes flat-out dumb that sometimes Jeff questioned if maybe sometime during their first year he got tackled a bit too hard at football practice. But that loyalty and whimsy that Troy always seemed to carry showed Jeff that the people you care about will be by your side no matter what, that they won't leave you, and that relying on other people isn't weakness, but strength. He thought back to that anxiety pill fiasco and how they'd ended up there in the first place. Troy bent over backwards to protect Abed from that French Stewart impersonator, and the group followed suit. Jeff tried hard to think of a time before Greendale when he would've even entertained that kind of idea. Nothing sprung to mind.

He thought about Shirley, someone who had impacted his life so much more than he had realized. She drove him to adopt the very personality he had slowly been chipping away for the past three years. The callous, narcissistic ass that arrived at Greendale arrived courtesy of the Big Cheddar herself (along with one other event which he was currently blocking out for the sake of reminiscing.) But she had showed him much more than that since arriving here at school. He had never met someone so dedicated to family; even going so far as to force Christmas on them their first semester at Greendale after knowing each other for only a few months. She showed him that family doesn't just mean parents, siblings, cousins, or any of that. It can be anyone, and without a doubt he could call those six weirdoes his family thanks to Shirley 'Big Cheddar' Bennett.

He thought about Britta. Whenever he thought of Britta, his thoughts wandered back to the first semester, when he tried so adamantly to get her into his bed. As he thought that, twisting his face in over-exaggerated disgust at his past-self, he realized he had Britta to thank most of all for his new family, because if she hadn't called his bluff and assembled that group of misfits, he most likely never would have spoken to any of the people he now couldn't go more than a week without seeing. In addition to that though, he saw her generosity. He saw her intense passion about making a difference, and even though she was so bad at it, she never gave up. Whether it was protesting about Beirut or diagnosing a random passerby with schizophrenia for sneezing four times in a row, she attacked issues with the same spirit no matter how dumb or how wrong she was. She was addicted to hot-button issues. Her spirit was strangely uplifting to Jeff. He admired her for her ability to simply be passionate for passion's sake. He hoped it was rubbing off on him.

He thought about Pierce. He would never, ever, ever say it out loud, but even Pierce contributed to Jeff's recent breakthrough. Pierce showed him the dangers of closing yourself off from the ones you care about. He showed Jeff that this cynicism and forced solitude he had maintained for so long was nothing more than a defense mechanism for loneliness. At the same time, though, he showed him that it's never too late. When Jeff first met Pierce, he was basically a walking stereotype for a 1950's cigarette salesman. Bigoted, arrogant, antiquated. But now, in the past week alone, he had witnessed this same man, a guy who almost actively attempted to drive Fat Neil (er, Real Neil? Just Neil?) over the edge, forgo his own inheritance in favor of his half brother and reprimand that douche Alan for calling Jeff gay. If Pierce could change for the better, anyone could. Even someone like himself.

And finally, he thought about Annie. He didn't think anyone had impacted him more over the past three years than this girl- no, young woman - had. She believed in him unconditionally (mostly) and always managed to see the best in everyone. She made him want to become less selfish, she made him want to put others before himself. Of course, he didn't do that very often yet, but the drive was there, and occasionally is better than never, right? Annie showed him that weakness could be overcome, second chances are within reach, and anything can be accomplished if you work hard enough for it, settle for nothing less than you best, and stay optimistic. She was in many ways polar opposite of him, but at the same time they were so similar it was eerie. Jeff always seemed to underestimate her, whether it was her drive, her ambition, her diabolically sneaky, sometimes subtle, sometimes not so subtle, manipulation techniques. And she was off limits. At least, that what he's been chanting in his head for the past two years, trying to convince himself that they had a brother-sister relationship between them, or a father-daughter relationship, or a cousins relationship, or anything but a potential romantic one. He couldn't afford to let that guard down, and risk destroying what had become his most important friendship here at Greendale. He found that he could talk to Annie about anything, at any time, and taking things further only to have him screw it up with his commitment issues just was not an option. At least, it didn't use to be. But maybe things would be different from now on. And his age argument held less and less water every day. She was 21 now, almost 22, a full-fledged big-time grown up who could and did make her own decisions. Besides, he wasn't that much older than Britta or Abed at 34, and Britta was currently caught up with Mr. Troy 'Truest Repairman' Barnes, barely a year older than Annie. Ok Winger, you're getting off topic. Focus.

He tried to push those thoughts from his mind as he brought himself back to reality, sitting on his laptop at the study room table. No doubt he had been staring intensely at the screen, glassy-eyed for the past ten minutes at least. And he had just Winger-speeched himself in his own head. Maybe Alan was right. Maybe this placed had made him 'so gay.'

He let out a small chuckle and shook his head. His eyes focused once again on the laptop's glossy screen, coming to rest on the text within a search box in the center of a simple white page, emblazoned in huge purple letter above. William Winger. His dad. The man he had despised, who he had blamed for all of his problems, shortcomings, and misfortunes for his entire adult life. He wasn't sure specifically why he had decided to finally seek him out, but all he knew was that somehow, he was ready. The study group had made sure of that in their own special way, each offering him incentive to meet them half-way, to improve himself in order to pay back this group of lovable weirdoes and misfits that had become his family. His finger, having long since dropped back to the table as he reminisced, hovered once again over the black 'Enter' key on his keyboard. With one last deep breath, summoning all of his willpower, and secretly, very secretly, wishing that Annie or any one of the group was here with him, he pressed 'Enter.'


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer! I do not own Community, or any of its characters or locations. I didn't own it in the prologue either, in which I forgot to put a disclaimer. So….yep. Enjoy!**

Annie walked through the library with a bounce in her step, humming 'Daybreak' as she went. The rollercoaster of emotions from the past two months had finally come to an end for the most part, and she could finally relax and focus on the upcoming semester at Greendale. She could hardly contain a relieved sigh at the thought of even being at Greendale once more, where not even a week ago she had no longer been a student. But that was done now, the group had managed to get re-enrolled and they had all made up their biology credit in time for the new semester. Everything was back on track.

Annie was in the middle of brainstorming for which class the group could take for the semester as she rounded the corner into the study room. She stopped short, her smile widening ever so slightly when she noticed who was sitting at the table.

Jeff was sitting in his usual spot, his hand running over one of the splintered cracks in the wooden surface left by a fire axe at the beginning of the semester, in an event he had kindly requested no one ever mention again ever. Jeff was staring at his laptop, but she could tell from his unfocused gaze that he wasn't paying attention. He had a small slip of paper in his other hand, folded up and clenched tightly between his fingers. She furrowed her brow slightly, tilting her head to one side as she observed the seemingly invaluable scrap of paper. What could it be? She cleared her throat a bit to announce her presence.

"Hey, Jeff!" she said, smiling brightly.

He snapped out of his trance, a look of worry crossing his face for a split second before he wiped the expression and replaced it with a weak smile. Annie took notice however, and her smile faltered slightly. Jeff Winger's mask rarely came off, even for a second. Something was definitely bothering him.

"Hey Annie, what are you doing here? Schools out, remember?" he said, smirking in an attempt to cover up his momentary lapse in swagger. He was attempting to deflect her, she thought.

She made her way over to the chair adjacent to him, scooting it to the side so she faced him in profile. She paused a moment, trying to devise a way to get him to spill the beans on what was worrying him.

"I stopped by to grab a course book! I had forgotten to grab one earlier, and what with us not being students here a week ago I wasn't really thinking about it then. I was looking for ideas on which class we should all take next semester! Anyway, what's your excuse? You were here first, mister. You're usually never here unless you have to be. Is everything ok?" Annie said in a rush.

She had meant to sound more laid back and nonchalant about the questioning, but she was fairly certain she had managed to sound exactly the opposite of that. In fact, she was pretty sure everything she said came out as one word. Annie was not good at thinking on her feet. She was a planner; spontaneity was not in her repertoire just yet. She scanned Jeff's face as she waited for an answer, playing with the hem of her sundress like she tends to do when she's nervous or excited.

Jeff's mouth curled up at one side, his eyes casting a look of amused exasperation as he sighed and straightened up in his chair. He knew what she was doing, she could tell. Cue the patented Winger evasiveness. She was surprised though when he nodded and looked up at her, about to speak again. Looks like she could save the Disney face for a rainy day, she thought with a laugh.

"Yeah," he said, "Everything's ok, don't worry. Just... trying to figure out my next move I guess." He hesitated for a moment, as if trying to decide what he should do next. He looked down at the paper in his hand, his thumb running over the thick crease. He held it up to her without a word.

Annie looked from Jeff to the paper, unsure of what information it held. She must've had a worried look on her face, because she heard him chuckle and say "Don't worry Annie; it's nothing bad I promise. I don't have cancer or anything like that." She looked up at him, her eyes wide. "Jeff! Don't even joke about that!" He laughed again, and indicated the paper once more with a nod.

She reached out and took it, carefully unfolding it as she glanced back up at him uncertainly, though she wasn't quite as worried as before. She flattened the paper with her hand as her eyes scanned over it. A look of confusion gave way to wide-eyed realization as she began to comprehend the words scrawled on the paper in Jeff's handwriting:

_William Winger_

_2222 Marine St._

_Boulder, CO 80302_

_303-555-5460_

Annie stared at the words. William Winger. Jeff's dad, it had to be. He'd found his dad? How long had he been looking? Why didn't he say anything before? What was he going to do? She tore her eyes away from the paper and met his gaze. He was looking up at her, his head bowed forward as he leaned slightly away, the expression on his face one that was expecting reprimanding. She thought offhandedly about how adorable it looked before she returned her attention to the matter at hand.

"Jeff… this is huge. Are you sure about this?" she asked, a look of concern plastered across her face. He seemed to relax a bit at her less than severe reaction. He shrugged.

"I'm… pretty sure. After giving that whole speech yesterday at the trial, and the past two months- well, past two semesters really -I feel like it's time to stop settling for the guy I am and start trying to be the guy I can be. You know, someone who's not a pompous, jaded ass...right?" He smiled as he said the last bit, and Annie smiled back her heart swelling. He continued, "I can't really explain it, but I just feel like I can't start working on me until I find this guy and verbally tear him a new asshole to make up for all the crap he put me and my mom through, you know? I thought that might be the smart, responsible thing to do." He faltered at the end of his explanation, staring back at the screen on his laptop, which Annie noticed was completely blank.

She was smiling like an idiot by now. Her face was starting to hurt. She reached a hand over and rest it over his, dipping her head to meet his downturned gaze.

"Jeff, it's great. I think it's the right thing to do. I mean it's like you said, right? It's time to just stop hating ourselves? This could be a big step. I think you should go for it." She spoke gently, seemingly trying to avoid startling him into changing his mind.

His expression was one of contemplation for a few moments, and then,

"Man, I'm glad someone listens to those dumb speeches I'm always giving. I just make 'em all up on the spot." Annie rolled her eyes at him. Of course he'd break the tension with sarcasm. Though she couldn't help but notice it was much more sincere than usual.

"Seriously, Jeff! It'll be really good. I could go with you if you want!" She tried to meet his gaze but he was staring intently at his hands. Realizing what she said, her eyes widened, and she quickly added, "We could all come with you! Moral support?" She posed the question tentatively, hoping she covered up her mistake adequately enough. She didn't want him thinking she was reading into things. She had taken to being extra cautious with Jeff when it came to that. He spooked easily.

Jeff looked up at her, his eyebrows raised slightly. He was smiling though, so that was a good sign.

"I appreciate that Annie. I think this is something I need to confront on my own though. You know, inner demons and stuff. I think I can handle it." He briefly placed his free hand on top of hers before motioned for the slip of paper. Annie handed it over.

She couldn't help but feel a little disappointed at his refusal, but she understood all the same. Facing a parent, and your past, was a terrifying prospect, but he did bring up a very good point. She tried not to think about that. She turned her attention back to Jeff and nodded.

"I totally understand. It's a really big step you're taking Jeff! I'm glad you decided to go for it. I'm so proud of you!" As she finished speaking she perked up, eyes widening along with her smile as she bounced slightly in her chair, driving home the notion that she was in fact very excited for her very tall, handsome friend.

At this, Jeff began to laugh, seeming to revel momentarily in her happiness on his behalf. Inwardly, Annie began to cheer even louder. She was witnessing history unfold in front of her eyes as far as she was concerned. Jeff Winger had admitted a problem he had, resolved to face said problem, and genuinely laughed in her presence. Those three things may not all happen again at the same time, unless she had anything to say about it. She would worry about that later though.

Somewhere in the middle of her inner monologue she realized they had stood up, and were headed to the door. Before she could organize her thoughts, Jeff had begun speaking again, glancing over at her as he spoke.

"So have you found any potential candidates for the Greendale Seven Study Group class? I'm sure you've got lists upon lists of pro's, con's, level of difficulty, optimal timeframe perhaps? I'm excited to hear your ideas." He smirked at her as he approached the library entrance, pulling open the door and gesturing for her to proceed, his eyes dancing as he nodded silently, implying his half of their usual exchange.

_Milady._

She smiled bashfully, curtsying slightly and silently returning the gesture- _Milord_- before walking out into the cool evening air. She paused slightly, falling in step with Jeff as he caught up, before putting on an affronted expression.

"Jeez, you make it sound like an obsession! What makes you think I've even made any decisions yet anyway?" Jeff stopped walking, raising his eyebrows at the young woman. He smirked.

"Because you're Annie. You're a pathological list-maker." He said, as if it was obvious. Who was she kidding, it _was_ obvious. Of course she had done all of that already. He went on, "You make lists for everything. I seem to recall you mentioning your backpack selection process being particularly grueling. You've got a list, and I think you've already made up your mind." He gave her a triumphant look, seemingly deciding his victory was all but assured. She tried her best to ignore it and focused on pretending to be disgruntled.

"For your information, I haven't even looked at the course listings yet!" She retorted, trying desperately to sound convincing. In reality, he was exactly right. She had spent all last night researching and narrowing down her choices to a shortlist of twenty. She had planned on deciding on the class tonight, at the library. She hated that he was right.

She turned quickly, trying to avoid eye contact with him as she attempted to stay three steps ahead so as to not give herself away. Unfortunately for her, he was too fast. He caught up to her easily, lazily strolling beside her as his infuriatingly smug smirk grew even wider.

"You'd make a terrible lawyer, you know that Annie? You are an awful liar." She spun on him unexpectedly.

"Yeah well, I'm just as qualified as you aren't I?"

Even Annie was taken aback by her sudden reaction. It came out a little more heated than she had intended, almost sounding angry. Being teased about her unflinchingly rigid planning habits had never really bothered her before. But now, after her conversation with Abed a few weeks ago, Jeff's teasing remarks seemed to have struck a nerve. She didn't want to be the uptight, controlling girl in the group.

In any event, she had gotten her point across fairly effectively. Jeff stood there open-mouthed for a second, taken aback by her unexpected outburst. He held up his hands in surrender, an unidentifiable expression on his face.

"Whoa, sorry there cowgirl. Fine, you are a fantastic liar. You should run for a political office. Am I forgiven?"

Annie shook her head and sighed. "Yeah, sorry Jeff, I don't know where that came from."

"It happens. Consider it ancient history! Anyway my car's over here" He gestured to his Lexus, and began walking once more, headed toward his car. He slowed down and turned to the side, seeming to have remembered something as he called back to her. "Before I head out though, I would like to hear if you have any class ideas. Honestly."

Annie's car was in the other direction, but she couldn't help but smile for what felt like the hundredth time during their short conversation as she nodded her head silently and followed, wanting to continue talking for a few more minutes. Annie explained to Jeff the criteria for how she would pick their classes, and he patiently listened as she walked him through every detail of the difference between weighted and non-weighted courses.

When they finally reached Jeff's car, they stood staring at each other for a few seconds, and then each began to speak at the same moment. Jeff pursed his lips and nodded his head, signaling for her to go first.

Annie blushed a bit as she began to speak, seeming to have reverted back to the old sophomore version of her. She had to fight the urge to start playing with her hair. Why now?

"Ok, so you were right. I do have a list of classes." She ignored the hint of a smirk that appeared on his lips as she continued. "I have a bunch picked out and I just wanted to look into them more and see which ones would be best for the group to take. I came to the library to look them up in more detail but obviously I got distracted." She tried her best to shoot Jeff an accusatory glare, but judging by the look on his face she had failed miserably.

Jeff tried his best to look apologetic, and Annie could tell it was a face he very rarely attempted to use. A strange cross between a grimace and a smile crossed his face, and Annie couldn't help but let out a laugh. Jeff rubbed the back of his head as he leaned against the side of his black Lexus.

"I'll just go ahead and let you know now that whatever you pick, I'm on board for. As long as it's not Calculus, or Physics, or like, Quantum Mechanics and Dark Matter within the Block Universe or something crazy like that." He glanced over at her, becoming slightly…shy maybe? She couldn't quite tell. She mentally pinched herself, making sure all of these new Jeff emotions she was witnessing were in fact real.

"Sorry I distracted you, though." He spoke sincerely, looking everywhere but at her, seeming uncomfortable. It took Annie a second to realize why he had suddenly become self-conscious, before she remembered his reason for being in the library. She let out a tiny gasp.

"Oh! Jeff, I almost forgot! I'm sorry, you didn't distract me really I was just…" She trailed off, realizing that her apologies would fall on deaf ears. She bit her lip uncertainly as she studied Jeff's face, which was lost in thought once more. Hesitantly, she spoke up.

"What are you gonna say to him?" She asked meekly, as if expecting him to lash out at her. Instead, he simply smiled tightly, meeting her gaze finally.

"Hadn't thought about it really. I'm headed there tomorrow first thing. It's a long drive to Boulder from Greendale. I guess I was just gonna….wing it. Hope for the best, you know?" He fidgeted nervously as he awaited her response, unsure of what to do. Annie gave him a reassuring look and tried to formulate her next response.

She once again recalled her conversation with Abed in the Dreamatorium a few months earlier, smiling vaguely. 'Wing it,' she thought, eyes becoming unfocused as she remembered more details about their rather intense journey of discovery within the barren room, promising each other to stop planning things out so much and just start winging it. It would probably be more exciting, more unpredictable and dangerous, she thought to herself. She hadn't really applied the lesson too much lately.

Jeff loudly cleared his throat, tearing her back to the present, standing beside the tall man in the deserted Greendale parking lot beside his car. She smiled back at him. _No time like the present_, she thought.

Then, throwing caution to the wind- and with minimal forethought- she flung her arms around him, gathering him up in a tight hug. She heard him grunt and felt slightly guilty for knocking the wind out of him before she felt him return the hug and all other thoughts left her head.

She sat there enjoying the consequences of her hasty decision, namely being completely surrounded by Jeff Winger, thinking to herself that she should have begun winging it a long time ago. She made another to-do list in her head, making sure to put that right at the top. Reluctantly, she pulled away, smoothing out her now slightly disheveled sundress. She apologized once more, craning her neck to meet his eyes in their still very close proximity.

"It'll go great, Jeff, I know it. I'll be rooting for you." She gave him an uncharacteristically sly wink as she took a step back. He chuckled and gave her an appraising look, running his hand through his hair again. He seemed surer of himself now, Annie noted, allowing herself to feel pride at the idea that she had helped restore some of his confidence.

"Thanks, Annie, I know you will." He pushed himself away from his car door and made his way around to the driver's side. He paused when he opened the door, looking over at her.

"You're pretty important to me, have mentioned that before? Drive safe, I'll see you guys at your place Saturday." With a genuine smile, he climbed into his car and began pulling away into the darkness.

Annie waved after him, feeling dizzy. So many things had happened in such a short period of time, she couldn't wrap her head around it; Jeff resolving to confront his dad, expressing emotions beyond arrogance, barely using any sarcasm, and genuinely seeming…sincere. It was all very… un-Jeff-like. For the moment though, she couldn't bring herself to care. For all the charm he had when he acted aloof and sarcastic, sincere Jeff was equally as appealing. At the moment, however, she chose to focus only on the part where he had said she was important. He had said it before, sure, but in the context of their conversation it seemed to hold even more significance. She bit her lip and grinned, her eyes fluttered involuntarily at the thought.

Slowly, she began walking to her beat up old Accord, smiling like an idiot along the way. When she finally cleared her head enough to focus on driving, she began her journey home. Within the silence of her car, her thoughts once again began to wander. So far, in one attempt of acting spontaneously, without any forethought, it had resulted in a decidedly satisfying turn of events. She really, really needed to wing it more. She made a mental note to give Abed a nice big hug as well when she got back to the apartment.

She did just that when she returned, which Abed accepted with a very confused look on his face. When she entered her room, she sat down at her desk and pulled out the Greendale course book and her list of courses, ready to once again narrow down their options. She half-heartedly erased three courses from her list right away:

_Calculus_ _116, Physics 101, and Quantum Mechanics and Dark Matter within the Block Universe._

_**A/N-**__ Boom. So I don't have a great grasp on the formatting process when it comes to uploading, so italics that indicate thought or emphasize certain words may be missing. Hopefully I'll figure it out as I go. Also, story notes: I feel like Jeff is/will be slightly OOC for this chapter and the next, but he's going through some stuff. Annie is just hard to write for me. One more serious chapter, then shenanigans for a bit after that! Sound good? Excellent. Be sure to review and I will do my best to respond to you guys as soon as I can! Sorry for the giant addendum here. I'll see myself out now.._

_-TA_


	3. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer- Still do not own Community. **_

* * *

_What are you doing Winger?_

The question was running through Jeff's head on repeat, eating away at him endlessly as he sat in his car, staring vacantly out the windshield.

He had arrived at his destination hours ago. It was relatively easy to find, Jeff had been in Boulder many times for work in the past. But as he sat there, across the street from the row of houses that held the last man he really ever wanted to see, he realized just how terrifying it was to be there.

Everything that could have been, the source of all the stigmas and phobias and mental hang-ups that should have been avoided, laid beyond the door to one of homes not twenty feet to his left. And yet here he sat, for…three hours now according to his phone's display. Fantastic. Even after all the breakthroughs that he had convinced himself had occurred for him, in the face of something real, he panicked. Typical Winger.

Jeff closed his eyes in exasperation, coming to a decision in his mind. His car hummed to life as he turned the key in the ignition, ready to get back on the road and put this silly little fantasy of solving his problems behind him. He tried to convince himself that he had the address; he would just come back when he was more prepared for it. It was too soon now, he wasn't quite ready. Just as he had shifted into gear, two quick, loud beeps sounded from his right pocket. A text message.

_Hey, I hope I didn't miss the deadline on well-wishing! Good luck Jeff : )_

Of course it was Annie. She always seemed to swoop in and offer some support, even when she was hours away.

As Jeff read Annie's message, their conversation from the previous night came rushing back to him. Seeing her words of encouragement left him feeling a strange mixture of emotions, most of which he couldn't quite name, and a few he was pretty sure he'd have to invent names for. He would call them 'Annie-motions,' he decided. He cracked a smile at his clever word-play, mentally patting himself on the back, before remembering where he was.

He quickly sobered up, coming to realize what he was doing. If he backed out now, he not only let himself down, he let down Annie. Could he do that? Could this new and improved- ok, _improving_- Jeff Winger let down this girl who so strongly believed in him even when he advised her, using very reliable insider information, that she shouldn't?

He let out a labored sigh, knowing the answer before he had even posed the question in his mind. Of course he couldn't. Letting himself down was one thing, but with Annie, it was different. She seemed to step in and fill the role of providing the final push into committing to important, life-changing things he had always so desperately missed. She subconsciously guilted him into doing the right thing, making the difficult choice, standing by a decision without ever seeming to do so on purpose. She made his life more difficult that way, and as he sat there he realized that it always ended up benefitting him in the end in some way or another.

The hum of the engine died and Jeff shoved the phone back into his pocket. He swore under his breath as he exited the car, mentally cursing Annie, her dumb positive influence and her particularly persuasive smiley text messages. He briefly considered changing numbers when he returned home before returning his attention to the task at hand.

He double-checked the address he had scribbled on the slip of paper in his hand as he walked, coming to a halt in front of the correct house.

It was fairly non-descript; a plain row home with no outward decoration to speak of. A quick glance up and down the row showed it stood in stark contrast to the intricately manicured flower beds and hedges flanking the front of every other home on the street. People seemed to try hard in this neighborhood. All except for the house lain out before Jeff. It seemed as though whoever lived there was dedicated to putting forth as little effort into their home as possible.

_Well, this is definitely the right place then,_ he thought with a scowl.

His clenched fist hovered inches from the door, hesitating in spite of him. Technically, it wasn't too late to back out. _Just put your hand down, turn around and walk away. It's that easy Winger._ Jeff shook his head slightly, shaking those thoughts from his head and keeping an image of Annie and the rest of the study group and their dumb, caring faces in his head as he knocked sharply on the plain green door before him.

It seemed as though the seconds stretched into hours in the instant following his knocking, and he suddenly became very aware that a giant knot had become lodged in his throat. He swallowed nervously, unsure of what to do. If there was one thing Jeff Winger was not used to, it was this overwhelming sensation of nervous dread. A million thoughts began racing through his head and he became faintly aware of the sound of footsteps approaching from the other side of the door.

The sound of locks being turned dragged Jeff back to reality, snapping his attention back to the door in front of him. Anxiety began to overtake him, and suddenly he was staring at his feet, jaw clenched, waiting for the inevitable question.

"May I help you, sir?"

The voice was warm and feminine, and unless things were about to take a really weird turn, definitely not his father's. He furrowed his brow in confusion as his eyes darted up to meet the woman standing in the threshold. She was an older woman, in her sixties he guessed, with pure white hair and horn-rimmed glasses framing her kind face. She craned her neck to meet his gaze, Jeff towering over her easily.

_Well this is not what I expected._

"Sir, are you ok?" He suspected that his expression had mirrored the initial shock he had felt upon seeing her. He shook his head slightly, catching up to the situation at hand.

"I'm sorry ma'am, I must have the wrong address. I was looking for William Winger, but, um, you most certainly aren't him. I must've written down the wrong address. Sorry to disturb you, I'll just be going now." He cringed in humiliation as he forced out his explanation. Real smooth, Winger.

It shouldn't have come as a surprise really. He had relied on an internet web search; they're bound to be outdated and unreliable. It could have been a mislead put in place by his father to avoid being tracked down. He should have prepared for these possibilities, if only to avoid embarrassing himself in such a way. As he turned to leave, hanging his head in an odd mixture of relief and resignation, the woman spoke up.

"Oh, William? He's just downstairs; I can fetch him if you like?"

Jeff froze in his tracks. He whirled around a bit faster than he should have, the knot in his throat returning in a flash. Silently, and after hesitating a few moments, he nodded at the woman, taking a step closer to the door. She motioned him in before disappearing down the hall, mumbling something about poor manners.

Jeff brought himself fully into the house, glancing around the foyer while nervously tapping his foot. _Well, I guess I'm locked in to this_, he thought to himself. To his left was what appeared to be a sitting room, with a leather couch pushed up against the far wall and two leather chairs on either side. A small coffee table sat in the center of the room. Adorning the walls were countless photographs and paintings, most of which contained a man and a woman.

Jeff stepped up to one wall, eyes scanning the pictures, eventually settling on one that seemed to be taken fairly recently. Jeff recognized the woman in the picture as the same woman who had answered the door. She looked slightly younger in the picture, with flecks of auburn showing through her largely graying head of hair. As he had guessed, it looked to have been taken a few years ago, but compared to many of the others it was brand new.

After taking note of this, Jeff's attention shifted to the man in the picture. He felt a chill as he took in the man's features. From what Jeff could tell he was quite tall and quite handsome, but age appeared to be catching up with him. His hair was a dusty grey color, with hints of golden brown hair splashed along the sides of his head. But the thing that caught his attention the most was obviously his face; more importantly, how much his face looked like Jeff's face. The man in the picture was the spitting image of Jeff, or rather, vice versa, and it brought forth a myriad of emotions within him as he stood there connecting the dots.

_The man in this picture is my father. This is William Winger, the guy who left mom and me twenty some odd years ago without as much as a 'good luck, champ.' And he has a wife. He looks happy. How quaint._

From relief, to disbelief, to resentment, and finally bitter anger, Jeff was overwhelmed by emotion. He was sure he was currently suffering from what he liked to call 'emotion sickness,' and the source of it was now marching up the stairs toward him for a second round no doubt. In a surge of anger, Jeff tore at the picture on the wall, knocking it to the ground where it shattered with a loud crash. He swung around to leave, deciding that this was all a huge mistake, and was halfway out the door when once again a voice called out to him. Man, people really loved to wait 'til the last second didn't they?

"I never did like that picture. Not too flattering, to be honest." Jeff's jaw clenched when he heard the voice, and he was rooted to the spot.

"Leaving already? I would have thought my son would have a few questions for me, to catch up on lost time. Why don't you come in and have a drink?" The man, William Winger- _Dad_ - called after him, a sardonic tone infused in his words. It was a very Winger-like response. Jeff was infuriated by it.

"I don't really think you know what you're inviting in at the moment. And I'm not thirsty, thanks." He said through still-clenched teeth, refusing to turn around just yet in fear that he would reactively take a swing at the man responsible for so many of the issues Jeff battled with on a daily basis.

"Come on now, son, you-"

"Do _not. Call. Me. Son._"

Jeff finally turned around, anger taking over in spite of himself, glaring daggers at the older man. He stood fuming in the doorway, unable to say anything more. William gave him an uneasy smile.

"So- Jeffrey. I can call you Jeffrey right?" Jeff gave him a short nod. William went on, raising his hands in a placating gesture.

"Ok, Jeffrey. You came all this way, out of the blue. Somehow, I doubt it was to check in. You're here for an explanation I'm assuming? Want to know how I could do such a thing I'm sure. Can't say I never expected it, though lately I had thought you might have given up on seeking me out. Why don't you come and sit down and I'm sure we can talk everything out like adults. I owe you that much."

Jeff let out a hollow laugh.

"Oh, you owe me so much more than that, William. You can't even _begin_ to imagine." Without another word, Jeff shoved passed his father and into the sitting room. He sat down in the center of the couch and leaned forward, his head in his hands. He glared up at the older man, expectant.

William threw an uneasy glance at his wife before taking a seat in the cushy leather seat to Jeff's right. He appeared to take a few moments gathering his thoughts before awkwardly clearing his throat.

"Well, I know it really wouldn't hold much weight given the circumstances, but I would like you to know that I'm sorry, Jeff." William had moved to one of the chairs, also leaning forward. He paused for a few seconds, waiting for a response from Jeff. When it didn't arrive, he continued.

"Right. I know this is the part of the speech where I tell you that I regret everything I've done and beg forgiveness. But to be honest I don't think I will. I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you and your mother, but you seem to be doing quite well for yourself. I think we both benefitted from my leaving in the end, if you really think about it. I'm happy here with Monica, and you seem to be quite the confident, independent man."

As William spoke, the veins in Jeff's forehead stood out more and more. He had grown deathly silent, staring a hole into the coffee table in front of him. He turned to look at his father. When he finally spoke, his voice was barely above a whisper.

"Twenty years. _Twenty years_ you've been gone. For maybe ten of those years, I would wonder why you left. I would ask myself, what on Earth had I done that had been so terrible that it drove away my own dad. But for the life of me I just couldn't figure it out. I couldn't figure _any_ of it out, _dad_. So I stopped wondering, but the damage had already been done." Jeff began raising his voice, still staring down at the coffee table.

"I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me. I couldn't figure out why my mom wouldn't stop crying. I couldn't figure out how to fix any of it. But you know what? I'm glad you figured out how to get your happy ending. I'm glad you figured out how to avoid contact with me or mom for all this years. Nothing makes me gladder than knowing leaving us was apparently the BEST THING TO EVER HAPPEN TO YOU." He was standing now, his breath ragged after bringing his voice to a shout.

He stared down at William and Monica beside him, and closed his eyes in an attempt to calm down. He wanted nothing more than to leave this house and never come back, but now that he had started, but he felt compelled to really drive his point home before he left.

He just hoped he remained composed enough to get it all out without doing something drastic. He took a deep breath, sat back down, and began speaking, struggling to keep his voice as neutral as he could manage.

"You ruined my life. I couldn't go a day in high school without being made fun of for not having a dad. I couldn't even throw a baseball because you never even bothered to teach me. Mom tried so hard to make sure I felt like I still had a family, but the second you left was the second I had to face everything alone. When I wasn't in school I was taking care of mom, making sure she was happy and distracted until she was able to manage on her own. And I did it all without your help." His voice became thick and he furiously swiped at his eyes. His allergies must have been acting up. William and Monica simply sat in silence, grim expressions on their faces.

"Sure, eventually I toughen up, got a job, became successful, but every single moment since the day you got up and left has been its own little Hell. Not once do you even consider what you had put us through. I spent my life trying to perfect myself, to subconsciously prove to some guy who didn't even give a single _shit_ about me that I didn't _need_ him to care. That being close to people only set you up to get abandoned again. You left me in constant fear, and it drove me away. From everyone. From mom, from classmates, colleagues… everyone. All for you dad. All for…nothing." He seemed to visibly deflate as he breathed out his last sentence, gathering his head in his hands once more. They sat in silence for a few moments, digesting everything that had been said.

After a few minutes, William cleared his throat once more.

"Jeff, I- I don't really know what to say. It was a tough time for your mother and I. We tried to make it work, but it just…" He trailed off, his words failing him.

"Of course you did, dad. I have no doubt you tried your absolute hardest to work things out. But you know what? Your absolute hardest is nowhere near hard enough. Family takes effort, it's not something you just do and the second it gets shitty you cut and run. It's the long haul. If it wasn't for my own failures I might never have realized it myself."

Jeff's gaze bore into William as he spat out the words. He couldn't explain why he was so furious. He had expected to come here, say his piece and leave, but he found himself wanting to demand an explanation from this man. He didn't think he would get it. Maybe that's why he was so angry.

"You may think you've found the perfect life here with lovely _Monica_," he said he name as though it left a bad taste in his mouth, "but sooner or later you will be forced to face reality. You can't run from your problems, William. Sooner or later they'll show up at your doorstep demanding answers."

He stood up and took a deep breath, attempting once more to get control of his temper. When he finally managed to do so, he spoke in a deadly calm voice.

"This was a mistake. I shouldn't have come here. You clearly don't need me coming back and screwing up your perfect life. I'll just be going now."

He left without another word, leaving William and Monica where they sat, stunned into silence. When he returned to his car, he finally allowed himself to take a breath.

He felt a fleeting pang of regret at how he reacted to seeing his father, but he quickly smothered it as he recalled what little his father had said. That man hadn't regretted what he had done at all. In fact, he thought he was better off for it. He even had the nerve to claim they were _all_ better off for it! It made Jeff feel sick.

It made him even sicker when he came to the realization that he would probably have to come back here. Their conversation screamed _unfinished business_, no matter which way Jeff tried to spin it. For the sake of his own sanity though, he would not think about that until the time came. He had had enough emotional breakthroughs for one lifetime. He could practically _hear_ Alan calling him girl's names.

He needed a break.

For now, though, he had to head back to Greendale and pick up some alcohol for the get-together the group would be having in a few days. He would focus on that. He took a deep breath to calm himself once more and turned his car on. Before he pulled into the road, he brought out his phone, typing out the response he had neglected to send before his confrontation. He pressed send and began his journey home.

Back in Greendale, Annie's phone buzzed and she opened it to reveal Jeff's message. It was brief, but she couldn't help but smile to herself as she read it.

_You made it just in time. Can't wait to see you guys._

* * *

_**A/N. Boy, that escalated quickly. So Jeff confronted his dad, big step, big step indeed. I went back and forth about it, but ultimately it'll serve the story well I think. We have not seen the last of William Winger, rest assured. I wouldn't let him off the hook that easily. Anyway, next chapter will be more fun, though I hit a bit of a wall so it may be slower to arrive. Thanks so much for all the positive reviews, it's encouraging to read, especially from authors whose stories I enjoy very much! Til next time.**_

_**-TA  
P.S. All of my authors notes are pretty long reads. Sorry about that.**_


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